The reason that I can’t find the enemy is that I have yet to look within myself.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
We all want the best for ourselves. We all have the latent potential to achieve almost everything we desire. But often, we just can’t. Why?
Because we set our goals and yet do things that make it impossible to achieve them, unknowingly, we reinforce daily attitudes, thoughts and behaviours that stand in the way of achievement.
Here are five self-destructive behaviours standing on your path to success. The ones that must give way, now!
1. Procrastination
We are all victims of this self-limiting practice that makes us find things more challenging than they are. We always feel comfortable not doing something we know we must do. As much as avoidance feels alright, the emotional and psychological burden of not acting gets heavier. Beware that procrastination is the lack of force to get started, other than the inability to get something done. Slacking piles up stress and devalues time and ability to do the needful. Build the mental muscle to grind things that naturally feel hard. It’s the only way to make life easier.
2. Perfectionism
Whenever we do something, we should strive to do it well. But if we do not limit how far well goes…it starts to curtail our progression. Perfectionism may appear to be a strength at face value, but nothing in this life is perfect. No tree in the forest is super straight and without a knot. The more you seek perfection, the less time, experience, and resources you have to make the next step. There will never be a perfect time to do something, nor a perfect way of doing anything. Stop spending all your energy marching on the spot. Come on! Move on to the next thing or level, even if it doesn’t feel right to do it.
3. Over-Indulgence
Who wasn’t taught that too much of anything is poison? However good something is, it always has a limit. Even what we consider virtuous or fit for our well-being must be contained. Exercise, relationships, food, work, acts of service, kindness or even love. Anything. More often, we go all the way to do things we enjoy or do something good for ourselves without observing the optimum limit. Failure to know enough of a good thing is a recipe for self-destruction. Excess is always dangerous. Pay attention to limitations of quantities or timing in everything. Be wise enough to dodge the liability that comes with the good things in life.
4. Blame Shifting
Life is easier when we make something or someone responsible for our situation. It feels good when we are not culpable. We play blame-game to transfer responsibility and excuse our actions or inaction. Blame shifting is a narcissistic, ruinous behaviour to the perpetrator and the victim. It messes up relationships, undermines productivity and side-steps opportunities. Begin to take responsibility for your situation, no matter what. Steering clear of finger-pointing gives the power to act and overturn every situation, past or present. Stop playing the victim and manipulating to justify your shortcomings. It might be others’ wrongdoing, but never their obligation to correct it.
5. Negativity
Seeing the glass can be half-full or half-empty is all a matter of choice. This choice is hard because our brains are wired to see the risky or ugly side of things. And avoid them. But often, we practice and polish spotting adversity to become our default perspective. Negativity breeds negative outcomes. When we persistently see things as wrong, they become wrong. Overcome your negativity bias and start seeing the good side of things, even in difficult situations. Always appreciate life and embrace pleasantness instead of criticizing and complaining. And create your own world of positive reality.
Self-sabotaging behaviours are a sure way to keep you stuck. The only way to grow and progress is by identifying your self-inhibiting characteristics and saving yourself from yourself.
Break free from your own prison today!